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Ye Merrie Captionne Competitionne!

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Merriment is always at its best when shared.  A good joke usually benefits from an audience, and unfortunate (but amusing) accidents beg to be spied upon unintentionally.  Chuckling with a friend is indeed good medicine.  So this month we are inviting readers to share in the mirth by taking part in our first ever caption competition.  Three pictures below await the wit and wordplay of Theology Network readers.

To submit your captions, click on ‘comments’ below and give us a caption for ‘Whitefield’, ‘Aquinas’ and ‘Piper’.

The best entry will receive a copy of that book of most merrie theologie, The Unquenchable Flame by Michael Reeves. 

Let the banter begin!








32 comments on “Ye Merrie Captionne Competitionne!

  1. Piper… “God is most glorified in you when you are a 10 point Calvinist in Him” Whitefield was often legless when he preached Aquinas: Warning: the wearing of stupid pagan necklaces arouses nature’s wrath.

  2. Piper: ‘Rudolph lifted up his head and said “look at my magnificent antlers, Santa.”‘

  3. comment for Whitefield: “As I was saying, the sheep to my right, the goats over here to my left” comment for Aquinas: “And the Holy Spirit whispered to dear Thomas, ‘Summa Theologica,’ not ‘Sumo’. comment for Piper: “After painting a picture of Jonathan Edwards on the ceiling, Piper exclaimed, ‘Can you now see the light?’

  4. Whitefield: Whitefield was never very good with sermon illustrations (of Job 30:30). Aquinas: Not all doves represent the Holy Spirit (Hosea 7:11). Piper: “Moses was a lazy bum. See how easy it is?” (Exodus 17:12)

  5. Whitefield: “Now hear me out here. Her hat and his wig? They don’t really cut it.” Aquinas: “This ear wax issue has gone too far, Thomas.” Piper: “The spirit also works through shadow puppetry. Let me demonstrate . . . “

  6. Whitefield – “I got no strings to hold me up …” (tune from ‘Pinocchio’)

  7. Whitefield – “So that’s how you make a pizza base… whoops! Look out below!” Aquinas – Tom wanted to see if the dove was a simple thing by pulling out its tail feather… and it retaliated with a well-placed ‘missile’ to his chest. Piper: Seminar on enjoying God through dance – “So, heel turn, feather step, heel turn… and end with a big jazz hands”

  8. Piper: “On average, only ten seconds in every sermon of mine is delivered at a conversational volume.”

  9. 1. Oy – the strings are broken on these puppets. 2. Psst – that thing you’re writing with is my other arm. 3. Wait, lads – I’ve found an escape hatch in the ceiling.

  10. Unbeknownst to many, George Whitefield (A.K.A. “Magnificent George the Levitating Evangelist,” pictured here freeing himself from an airtight box) was a major influence on Harry Houdini.Young Tommy quickly learned that sticking his head in a large doughnut while walking through a park filled with hungry pigeons was not a very good idea.After careful study John Piper arrives at the number of his followers who are genuinely interested in his theology and not his personality…. It was following this crucial moment, wonderfully preserved on film, that Piper chose to take an extended sabbatical

  11. Whitefield: Mrs Whitefield’s face was beginning to show the strain of holding up the invisible piano on her head.

  12. Piper: "Then Jonah said: "You should have seen the other fish. It was this big!" Wait a second, where’s my ESV?"

  13. Whitfield. The countess of Huntingdon faints at sight of George’s armpit hair….. Aquinas ………. Thomas was a big fan of natural methods of cleaning ear wax ….. Piper " OK OK Bishop Tom you’re right on Justification and New Perspectives on Paul., We’ve got it wrong and Edwards was a numskull"

  14. Whitefield: "Look, no hands!" Aquinas: "Gosh, This Telephone-game is SO yesterday.." Piper: "Happy Hands Club!"

  15. Piper: "Sir Cort Godfrey of the Nessie Alliance summoned the help of Scotland’s local wizards to cast a protective spell over the lake and its local residents and all those who seek for the peaceful existence of our underwater ally"

  16. Aquinas: "Steal a feather will you? You should have finished me off when you had the chance!"

  17. Piper: Now I show you my expression of a Moose  Aquinas: The Holy Ghost is about to hit A. right in the head  Whitfield: Woman under neath is thinking: "If hell is really smelling like he is form his armpits… I do believe Lord, save me from that hour!!!"

  18. Whitfield’s early attempts to use puppets in preaching are not well-remembered among his achievements. A little bird told Aquinas his natural theology wasn’t all it was cracked up to be, but he wasn’t listening.  "Moose!" John Piper reaches the Final in the 2010 Pastors’ Animal Game Tournament.

  19. Whitefield: "With a grey background the fishing line is invisible – now watch her head move…." Aquinas: "Are you sure ear-piercing is spiritual?"  Bird: "Keep still while I take aim."  Piper: "Count your blessings, count them one by one…"

  20. Whitefield: you put both arms in, both arms out, and that’s what it’s all about. Quite appropriate since Whitefield undoubtedly did think the `Romish Mass’ a bit of `hocus pocus’.

  21. Caleb Woodbridge!


    Congratualtionnes Caleb!  Forsooth, a free copy of Mike Reeves’ "The Unquenchable Flame" is winging it’s way over to you asap!


    Thanks to everyone for participating! Particularly merrie contributions from Paul Blackham and Bo White.


    The Merrie Theologiane laughs!

  22. Whitefield : teaching on the holy spirit, he started by teaching that it is not magic cue his impersonation of a magician. \r\n\r\nAquinas : revealing his political persuasion. He is left, and most certainly not green. "pffh nature"\r\n\r\nPiper: Telling the story of how if he hadn’t been called to pastoral ministry then he would still be using his God given ability for basketball… in the NBA

  23. Whitefield. spectators look up Whitefield’s sleeve after he performs a disappearing act with his bible. Aquinus: Aquinus looks with glee after mastering his new trick, plucking a feather from a flying dove without looking. Piper: Piper teaches his congregation how to shoot a three pointer.

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